the best things in life are free

 

Funny jokes

 

 

God and man were having a conversation. Man said to God "Why did you make woman so beautiful?"
God replied "So you would love her"
Man said "But why did you make her so dumb?"
God answered "So she would love you".

Three kittens were trying to swim the channel.
Only two kittens made it.
Un deux trois quatre cinq.

News Flash: Two boys have been arrested for possesion of illegal fireworks.
They charged one, but let the other off.

A hole was discovered in the Kings Road.
The police are looking into it.

What did the bamboo say when he made a mistake?
"Shoot".

Why did the chewing gum cross the road?
Because it was stuck to the chicken's foot.

A man came home from an appointment with the hospital consultant, white and shaking.
"You look terrible. Whatever did the doctor say?" asked his wife anxiously.
"He told me I'd have to take a pill every day for the rest of my life."
"Well, that's not so bad, is it?
"He's only given me four!"

Said the boss to his secretary:
"That was a marvellous week we spent together in Paris. Will you ever be able to forget it?"
"What's it worth?" asked the secretary.